


Stay Hungry, Stay Foolish

by drainspoon



Series: Newt's Life Work aka his Angst Collection [3]
Category: Hermitcraft RPF
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt, Heavy Angst, Hurt, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, Unrequited Love, blame Poochenthecreator for this spontaneous angst, no bad guy this time!!, scarian - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-14
Updated: 2020-07-14
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:13:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25265890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/drainspoon/pseuds/drainspoon
Summary: He wasn't worth Grian's love, and he knew it.
Relationships: GoodTimesWithScar/Charles | Grian
Series: Newt's Life Work aka his Angst Collection [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1924231
Comments: 5
Kudos: 53





	Stay Hungry, Stay Foolish

**Author's Note:**

> blame Poochenthecreator for this. their python story made me sad so i decided to make everyone else sad.

"you know, i think you're pretty cool, scar."

the fluttery feeling made it's return, nestling itself in his throat so that he was unable to make a response, mouth hung slightly agar. the blue eyed beauty just kept on grinning at him, as if he was completely unaware of the love powered fireworks setting off in scar's chest—which he was. _and if he was, he would be absolutely disgusted with you because you're just his friend,_ the naggingly doubt in his mind came firing at him.

scar fought back a frown, forcing a smile, as he responded much too late, "yeah, i think you're cool too, grian." 

grian lifted up the shulker box of terracotta and he was reminded of why he had come. just to ask to borrow resources. _he didn't stop by just to see you, you needily responded to him first, that's all. you're just his friend, stop being like that._ he offered a stumbly goodbye wave as he started to fly away, scar waving as well as he watched the smaller man disappear to who knows where. _stop waving at him! you're so weird. he'll never love you, you disgusting fuck._

he spun on his heel, returning to current build to try to distract himself from his hopeless love. yet even when he tried his hardest to distract himself, he kept circling back to grian. every block sent him tottering back to thoughts of his soulmate _—not your soulmate! he's just your_ friend!—and the thoughts of how they were only friends. they all had the same general message, but they hit hard.

he wasn't worth grian's love, and he knew it.

 _why do you think of him like you do? you're just friends and that's all you'll ever be! its awful that you think of him like you do! you shouldn't think of your friends in such a way! you're fucking disgusting!_ scar rapidly shook his head, as if such an action would silence his thoughts, but they came anyways. _you aren't worthy of anything from him, especially not his love. your love for him is a lost cause. he would never love you. i mean look at you._

 _you should just leave the server. it's dangerous for someone like you to be near him. who knows what you might do? you're terrible._ it had gotten to the point that he didn't doubt their truth. the thoughts were so persistent and he couldn't ward them off even with magic. _a terrible friend._ maybe they were true. _a terrible person._

he pulled up the menu, letting out a shaky breath as his finger hovered over the button to leave the server. once and for all.

_no one would miss you. even if they did, they would get over it. they wouldn't even know you left. especially not grian. everyone would be much safer without someone who can't even stop himself from being in love with someone who could never love him. just get lost already!_

**_fucking coward!_ **

<GoodTimesWithScar logged off.>

**Author's Note:**

> in this "au", logging off the server is akin to,,,,, yknow. just without the death since permadeath isn't on.


End file.
